I'm turning over a new leaf this year. I'm going to stop inviting people who don't like to RSVP. As liberal a person as I am, there are just some social rules that are still in place for a reason. Letting a potential host or hostess know whether you can or can't make an event (be it small or large) is just common sense and common courtesy. This subject should be self-explanatory, but there are many people who either forget manners, don't know manners, or prefer to ignore manners. That is their right. It is my right to not invite them.
Mr. I and I have entertained quite a bit through the years. We aren't formal people, nor do we formally entertain. But 9 times out of 10 when we have a gathering, we don't know exactly who is showing up. Don't get me wrong, I understand the occasional forgetting. I understand that we all have busy lives. I also understand that people get sick at the last minute. I'm not Emily Post, so the RSVP doesn't have to be fancy. A text, email, call, fax, a shout out the car window as you race by, a rock wrapped with a note, a Morse Coded message or a smoke signal will do fine. Just let me know you got the invitation, that would be a start. There is nothing wrong with saying, "Hey! Thanks for the invitation. I need to check with __________(wife, husband, boyfriend, significant other, child, priest, therapist, rabbi, boss, dog, cat, parrot, gold fish...) to see if we have anything else going on. Can I let you know ASAP?" That is a WONDERFUL first step to recovering from "RSVP-atosis" and would be MUCH appreciated. Remember, the host with the most and the hostess with the mostess have to buy food, liquor etc. It is nice to know how much to buy.
For my friends and family who just can't quite commit to a Yes OR a No, here is a 6 step program for "RSVP-atosis"....you can thank me later.
Mr. I and I have entertained quite a bit through the years. We aren't formal people, nor do we formally entertain. But 9 times out of 10 when we have a gathering, we don't know exactly who is showing up. Don't get me wrong, I understand the occasional forgetting. I understand that we all have busy lives. I also understand that people get sick at the last minute. I'm not Emily Post, so the RSVP doesn't have to be fancy. A text, email, call, fax, a shout out the car window as you race by, a rock wrapped with a note, a Morse Coded message or a smoke signal will do fine. Just let me know you got the invitation, that would be a start. There is nothing wrong with saying, "Hey! Thanks for the invitation. I need to check with __________(wife, husband, boyfriend, significant other, child, priest, therapist, rabbi, boss, dog, cat, parrot, gold fish...) to see if we have anything else going on. Can I let you know ASAP?" That is a WONDERFUL first step to recovering from "RSVP-atosis" and would be MUCH appreciated. Remember, the host with the most and the hostess with the mostess have to buy food, liquor etc. It is nice to know how much to buy.
For my friends and family who just can't quite commit to a Yes OR a No, here is a 6 step program for "RSVP-atosis"....you can thank me later.
- Acknowledge the invite. Send a quick text or email just to say you received it.
- Don't be afraid that an invitation rejection will hurt the host's feelings. He or she would rather know you won't be there.
- If you aren't sure you really want to go, then don't. Just say you can't make it.
- If you don't like the person who invited you, respectfully decline-quickly and change your email address and possibly your phone number.
- If you are waiting for some better offer from Brad Pitt, Rush Limbaugh, Sharon Stone or Sarah Palin, then do everyone a favor; Just Say No.
- If you are planning to go to the event, then say so! Don't assume the host can read your mind or happens to know your schedule.
Thanks for letting me get that off my chest.
P.S. In case you wondered, or forgot, RSVP stands for "répondez, s'il vous plaît". However, you don't have to speak French to know what it means.
Here, let me update it for all those who care:
Respond
Sweetie
Very
Promptly
Sweetie
Very
Promptly
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